One might think the idea is crazy, and it is. Still, in consideration of the last six millennia of human management, children could not possibly do any worse than we adults have done. After 6000-plus years of ruler and ruled âthe ego-sponsored binary class system[i]– we have put ourselves into a situation tantamount to that of cancers; proliferating in both number and impact to the point of killing our host, the good olâ Mother Earth. We are still in Noahâs boat, metaphorically speaking, and in search of the landing; but because we are pulling on the oars in different directions, we might never find it. Nothing has, or ever will change, and things will continue to worsen up to the breaking point and the end of human suzerainty over the earth. We humans are more divided with respect to one another than ever, and at a time when unity and collaboration are the only operative strategies available to us, guaranteeing success. This means not only collaboration among humans, across all lines which divide us, but also collaboration with Nature, and with all other species, botanical and animal. From the beginning, adults have not provided what is humankind’s best, in the way of leadership.
Children, on the other hand, do not have the âbenefit;â more accurately, the cumulative weight, of adult experience. Children are like the buds on a tree in Springtime. Their first moments swathed in the light of the sun. Under such propitious conditions, they begin life, just full of life. They are trusting -unfamiliar with the concept of lying or telling anyone anything but the truth. They believe what they are told, because it does not occur to them that other people would be anything but truthful with them. They do not put a price on kindness, sharing, or helping. They pursue no personal advantage with respect to ânetworkingâ other than having more friends to play with. They maintain no hidden agendas, except maybe to pick their nose (as opposed to your pocket, say) when nobodyâs looking.
Anyone can see that the worlds of adults and children, the processes and goals and, it follows, their outcomes, are in diametric opposition to one another; the reason is, ultimately, EGO.[ii]  I thought it would be fun to explore what the world might be like if todayâs leaders were children still. I had a lot of fun writing this article!
-Trump and the China Sea- âWhat? You want to make some new islands and park some boats there? Can I come over and help? What about North Korea, Japan? Invite them too! Imagine the castles we could build…Itâs going to be great!
-Putin bare chested on a horse- âMom says I have to put my shirt back on or Iâll catch cold.â
–Xi Jinping- âThereâs way too many kids in our sandbox! Maybe they should have their own sandbox in their own backyards, and then we can take turns playing in each otherâs sandbox? Taiwan can have their own sandbox. Whatâs wrong with that? Weâll still be good neighbours, wonât we?â
-Justin Trudeau- âMom says I have to get my hair cut tomorrow… [long face] âŠand I got to put on my shirt tooâŠâ [envious look at Putin, who already has hair on his chest, and even gets to ride a horse to school.] âHey mom, can me and Vlady play bare-chested RCMP cops and robbers when itâs Summer again?
-Kevin O’Leary- Okay, thereâs one of them in every classâŠ
-Pope Francis- âLook, it says right here: Be as little children. Why does Father even think we need to be told that? Has He ever known any of his children to behave as if they were anything else but? Kids wouldn’t make bombs or guns and so we donât bomb innocent kids out of their sandboxes, even when their parents are mad at each otherâŠbut, say, if your best buddy gets on about something, it would be cool to get on a stealth bomber and super-soak his sandbox from up there, wouldnât it? No one would need to say a âHail Maryâ over that!â
-Stephen Harper- Although it has been a while since Gumby and his pal Pokey walked into any book for an adventure, Stephen always did his best to keep them alive. He so missed the two Claymation mavericks of his childhood, that he now does his best to look like Gumby and act like Pokey. Stephen canât make sandcastles either. He always wants to build the biggest castle, but using less sand than everyone else does, to prove that he is smarter than everyone else. He couldnât understand that if you fill your bucket with sand, and then hollow out the centre before you flip it over to make the tower, the tower will simply collapse in a heap. He would just stand there; staring at the piles he had made.
-Rona Ambrose- âI wish sheâd come over and play with usâ Donald says to whoever might be listening. âShe doesnât need to bring her own sand. We have plenty to share.â The Mexican kids who live on the other side of the Rio Grande look at one another in confusion. Donald just told them that they can play with rocks and wall themselves in, to keep them out of his sandbox.  âEventually, the wall will collapse, the rocks will crumble and turn into sand…then they’ll have lots of sand to come and play with.â When Donald is asked why Rona doesnât have to bring her own sand when the Mexican kids do, he says, âIt is to promote gender-parity in my sandbox,â wink-wink. All the other kids know what Donaldâs real reason for wanting Rona to come over is, but they also know he has a snowballâs chance in the warm place of going steady with herâŠ.she never even looks Donaldâs way because she is always watching Justin, who even lives in the same building as her.
-Elon Musk- âElon, your mom just called. You canât play space invaders with us until after you clean up your own backyard.â
-Bill Gates- âThomas Piketty, I say your theory is 99.9999999999% correct. The only change I would recommend is to add a couple of simple, three-letter words to it, like this: âDuring protracted periods of low GDP growth, if the return to investors is at a higher rate than GDP growth, what remains of the national income to be paid out in wages will [NOT] become progressively less;â and, âwe should [NOT] tax wealth in order to prevent the aforementioned from exacerbating wealth inequality, among and within nations, to the breaking point; very likely precipitating another world war.’ â
-Donald- Well, I think we all know how this tale will end⊠Donald alone in his own sandbox. Heâs built the sides so high no one can get in there to play with him. He ends up very lonely and cries to his mom every day that he doesnât have anyone to play with. Her answer is always the same: Stop being a bully and let his friends pick the game and make the rules up, once in a while. All of the kids in Donaldâs neighbourhood are wondering if heâll ever get it. Young Justin, half his age, hinted at it, got into trouble, and had to stay after school to write out lines.
I must not talk about root causes or Iâll never get elected.
Heâs still writing.
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[i] The binary, âus-and-themâ worldview is an outcome of the egoâs existential view. Please refer to the draft version of the manuscript appearing elsewhere on this site.
[ii]Â If you want to know why I keep picking on ego, please refer to the aforementioned draft version.